Quick Wicca FAQs

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Here are some Wicca FAQs to answer some of the most common questions about Wicca that I receive.

If you want to write me to ask a question, please check here first to see if it has already been answered. You can also use the Sitesearch tool to find answers.

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Wicca FAQs


How can I become a Wiccan?

You'd probably like specific 1-2-3 guidelines on getting started with Wicca. For those kinds of things, I generally recommend going with some books.

I would suggest checking out the books in the resources section. I highly recommend everything on that list. Starhawk and Cunningham in particular are exceptional resources for beginners, and Shadow of a Shaman too.

Other than that, you can look for workshops to go to. You might have to travel a ways, but sometimes it's better to do these things away from our home town anyway. Reclaiming's workshops are always excellent, and I highly recommend them. (Link opens in new window.)

If you're looking to learn about Wicca, I recommend reading through the Wicca Spirituality website, especially the section on Beginning Wicca.

This section also refers you to other resources, like books, and gives tips on choosing a good teacher.

You don't need to worry about learning Wicca from a b ook, either. You can learn from the original teachers: the Earth, the Moon, Nature, Animals, the Divine Within you, etc. That's where Wicca comes from, and that's still its spiritual and practical roots.

Pay attention to nature. Pay attention to what your body tells you -- your greatest teacher! Keep focused on the Divine. It's sounds too simple to be impressive, but it gives much greater training than reading any number of books!

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Where can I get more information about becoming a Wiccan?

Have you checked out the Wicca Info & Beliefs articles? There's a lot of useful information for beginners in them.

In particular, there are some excellent books to help beginners get started... check out these pages for more info: Wiccan Resources and Reviews of Wiccan Books .

Also Being a Witch has info on finding other Witches and stuff.

The whole website in fact is here to teach you about Wicca. Pretty much everything you might want to know is there somewhere, so check it out. You can also use the Site Search and Sitemap to help you find what you're looking for.

Have you signed up to get our online magazine, or blog? Both have lots of helpful information, and they're free.

There is also a thriving Wiccan community at the fan page on Facebook , and now you can follow Wicca Spirituality on Twitter.

You can even follow erin Dragonsong on Twitter.

That gives you a lot of information options! wicca-spirituality-winking_witch

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How do I know what to trust?

It can be hard to know what's true and what's not, when every kind of thing can get into a website... or even a book.

Your own gut sense, and then your experience, are the best guides.

Are they hyping their site with "no one else knows this" or "I'm gonna be in trouble for telling you this" kind of hooey? You can probably feel when someone's yanking your chain... just click off and go elsewhere.

Or if they are very heavy-handed, telling you what MUST be done and how, they're either inexperienced, missing the point, or just plain dictatorial.

If they ever advocate using or harming another being or invoking demons etc, they're totally off the mark. By definition, that is not Wicca.

Then, if you try some of what the others say, you will feel in yourself whether it seems good or not.

  • Does it work?

  • Do you feel good about yourself after?

These are pretty good guidelines.

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Is being a Witch expensive? I can't afford to buy tools.

The first and the last thing about being Wiccan is following your heart. Let it lead you....

All the "rules" and rituals are just guidelines and ideas, that's all.

You don't need expensive things. An altar can be a flower on a windowsill! Or a picture of nature on the wall. Or a crystal in a potted plant. A wand can be a beautiful stick, or a feather.

Wicca isn't about things. It's about you, the Divine, and the connection between the two.

The only things you need, in order to be Wiccan, are your head and your heart. Hands and feet and voice are bonuses. Everything else is just extras... they can help you focus and can make it more fun, but they're not crucial.

Even nature is, in this context, simply a "prop" to help you open that connection.

You can read more about altar and tool options here.

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Where can I shop for Wiccan stuff?

If you want to buy Wiccan things, there are stores in almost every city. Look for metaphysical bookstores, for instance.

To buy online, I like Metapot.com : Metaphysical Gift Shop and Wicca Store for online shopping.

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Do I need to have an altar?

Sometimes it's not very practical to have an altar. And sometimes you might not be able to afford a lot of stuff.

That's okay!

An altar is a very handy thing to have, on your spiritual journey. But there's nothing saying it has to be a certain way.

There's certainly nothing wrong with having a portable altar, if that's what would work best for you. Or a permanent one in the woods near your home. Or a permanent but subtle one in your bedroom (say, a candle, rock, shell, and feather on a windowsill).

The outer altar is, after all, only a symbol of your inner altar, the Temple of your Heart.

To read more about Wiccan altars, and what to put on them, and finding altar objects in nature, check out the section on Wicca Altars.

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What is the difference between Wiccan and Witch?

You're not the only one who's confused! This is an ongoing question among Wiccans, as well.

There are no strict definitions... or rather, there are many definitions, and many of them contradict each other.

For example, some people say that Wiccan is only for those who follow Gardnerian tradition. Others say it's for those who are more eclectic than traditional.

For myself and on this website, I use "Wiccan" for the spiritual and philosophical component, and "Witch" for the magickal action component.

But what you may call yourself is whatever feels most comfortable. After all, if there is no one accepted definition, how could it be wrong?

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How do I find my Wiccan name?

I've given a lot of information in the articles starting here get you on your way.

Once you've read those, start by making a list of what is important to you and things that you feel drawn to. This is a great place to start, because the search for your name is the search for the deepest truth of Who You Are.

I recommend doing ritual to ask for your name, and spending a lot of time being attentive in ritual. The Divine will speak, eventually, and show you a name. Sometimes this appears as an image, or a feeling, or a special ability you have... it can be anything.

Keep asking for your name to come to you, and be attentive to what shows up. It may take a while. It's more like a treasure hunt than buying something from Amazon... It's a process to the spiritual heart of yourself. But if you keep focused, it will come.

Your Wiccan name can be anything your heart tells you. Your heart will say whether something connects you with your Source or not.

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Finding Wiccan Community

It's natural to want to meet with people who share your interests, especially on something as profound as your spiritual path.

Unfortunately, it's difficult for most people to find other Wiccans. (See also the bit about finding a coven, below.)

Thankfully these days, the internet provides a lot of opportunities to connect with others. There are Wiccan forums and blogs you can connect with.

Have you signed up to get our e-zine or Blog? Both have lots of helpful information, and they're free.

There is also a Wicca Spirituality fan page on Facebook. Here you have opportunity to hear what's going on and share what's going on with you, and there are events from time to time.

Now you can also follow WiccaSpirit onTwitter, and get inspiring quotes and ideas, news items, and more.

There are other forums, too, that are not part of the Wicca Spirituality online community, but if you like forums try them out: Wiccan Web and Wicca Forums.

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Can I be a Witch if...


Can I be Wiccan even though I'm very young?

There is no age restriction on Wicca. There couldn't be!

Wicca is about spirituality. And spirituality lives in your heart. No one can stop you from loving what you love, feeling what you feel, and believing what you believe in.

The only difference that age makes is... how open you may decide to be.

When you are young, you are legally subjected to rules and judgements made by others. So you'll want to be especially careful who you tell, and what you say.

Some people will understand. Others never will.

But this is between you and the Divine, and no one else is really involved.

You don't need to have any special things, to be Wiccan. You don't have to do any specific things. You just need to honour yourself, and the Earth, and all beings.

I encourage you to follow your heart. You can explore Wicca or any spiritual path with no tools or rituals whatsoever, because all Wicca really is, is a journey to the Temple of your own heart.

Be sure to read the articles on being a Witch to understand more about what is involved in being Wiccan.

See also How to Tell Your Parents You're A Wiccan.

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Can I be Wiccan if I live in a city?

Of course! The Divine is everywhere! Even in concrete sidewalks and metal skyscrapers.

It's easier to connect with the Divine when you are in nature, though. So you can create your own little bit of nature, wherever you live.

When it comes down to it, Wicca is not about rites and rituals and dogma... it's about the practices that help you become more aware of the LIFE around you and within you.

There is much life even in a city, once you learn to find it.

  • Start spending whatever time you can in nature, and really becoming aware of it.

  • Notice what's growing along the sidewalks you pass.

  • Learn about the animals and birds that share your environment.

  • Pay attention to what time, and where, the moon and sun rise and set.

  • Standing barefoot on a tiny patch of grass, you can connect with the Earth Mother in a very immediate way.

  • Raising plants on a windowsill is helpful as well as a wonderful hobby.

  • Decorating your home with images of nature, a small water fountain, rocks, feathers, etc are all ways of bringing nature home with you.

  • And don't forget your computer desktop! A lovely beach scene, or a view of the sun rising over the Earth from orbit, or deep sea fishes... whatever softens your heart a bit is as good, almost, as being there yourself.

  • And when you can, go out to parks and other natural settings. You can "store up" a lot of those feelings, through the rest of the week, if you refresh yourself in nature on the weekends.

In other words, it may take a little ingenuity to connect with nature in an urban setting, but it's certainly possible. It's even fairly easy.

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How do I convert to Wicca if I was raised a Christian?

There's really nothing to "convert." If you want to be Wiccan, simply begin practicing.

There are tons of people who've come from Christianity to Wicca, so you're not alone!

Many of people worship both ways, as a Christian and a Wiccan at the same time... you can read more about that here.

If you're worried about whether you will go to Hell if you become Wiccan, these articles will help you make the transition from Christianity to Wicca.

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Can I be a Witch if I'm not initiated?

Initiations are like everything else... they can be helpful and wonderful, but they're not vital.

And many people initiate themselves.

If you want to join a group that insists on a certain initiatory procedure, then you'd probably need to do it however they decide. (Always remembering that you make the final decision on what feels right for you.)

Other than that, there are no actual rules about who can be a Witch and how. Some people follow traditions that have a set of rules, but there are none for Wicca as a whole.

To me, the "traditional" year-and-a-day of study is incredibly valuable, and at the same time, Wicca is a lifelong initiation and study. So why all the fuss? It's not like we stop learning after the initiation!

The Wiccan Realm is a particular kind of awareness, an attunement with the Divine and the Earth. How can that be regulated in any way?

A question I would ask you is: are you allowing anyone else to influence what your spiritual experience is?

No one can tell you what you "must" do, in spiritual things. Especially in Wicca, you are your own priestess and teacher, and the Divine Within You is the only one who may tell you what you must do.

So follow your heart's promptings. Do you feel like you need or want an initiation? That will tell you your answer.

The first and the last thing about being Wiccan is following your heart. Let it lead you....

All the "rules" and rituals are just guidelines and ideas, that's all.

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Men and Wicca


Can men be Wiccan?

Short answer: lots of males are Wiccan... it has nothing to do with gender. Here's an article on men and Wicca you can read.

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What are male Wiccans called?

"Wiccan" and "Witch" are both gender-neutral terms. They are the same whether you are female, male, or anything else.

Fantasy books and movies are the source of this confusion, using terms like Warlock. This is not a word that actual Wiccans or Witches use.

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Are men subordinate in Wicca?

No, it's not like patriarchal religions where most people have to be "less important" so a few people can be "more important."

Everyone is equal in Wicca. Honour comes with greater experience and spiritual development, not with a set of genitals and hormones.

Read more about this here.

Having said that, men in Wiccan circles need to be aware of how much power and space they are taking up. Men have little experience in the world with sharing power. They are taught instead to speak their mind, take control, etc. It's a common mistake for men to speak more loudly than others, to do most of the talking, to override other people's contributions, to try to lead all the time.

Sometimes men who are used to that dynamic feel less respected in a Wiccan Circle, where they are discouraged from taking centre stage. But it's really just a matter of finding out how to share power rather than dominate a group.

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What is the role of the God in Wicca? Is it all about the Goddess?

Wicca is certainly not just about the Goddess! Wicca balances the polarities... the Goddess and the God.

Although the Goddess and the God are seen as equal, the Goddess is just slightly more eminent in Wicca. Not "more than" the God, but somehow a little special, deserving of extra respect.

Perhaps it's only in balance to the priority the God receives in the rest of the world. wicca-spirituality-winking_witch

But in truth I think it's because the perspective of the Mother often serves Life better. The feminine view is more holistic, and honours all beings as equal, and is based in love and acceptance.

This is the viewpoint our world so desperately needs!

You can read more in this article.

Still, there are many Wiccans who celebrate mostly the Goddess, or even leave the God out entirely.

It's not disrespect of the God, though. It's a personal choice that can come from several reasons.

With the religious abuse the world has suffered in the name of "God," it is understandable that many people feel extremely uncomfortable with the idea of Gods. If that is so, they won't be able to work properly with male deities. (Of course, this can change over time.)

Another reason some Wiccans focus exclusively on the Goddess is to bring balance to the world in which She has been forgotten or demonised and the God has been elevated to the exclusion of the Feminine. "The masculine deity has plenty of ardent followers," goes the thinking, "so I will give 100 % of my energy to empowering the feminine deity."

Wiccans may wish to bring balance to themselves this way, too. If they find themselves overly identified with the masculine values, say, they might want to put more attention to the Goddess to encouraging the feminine values to grow in them.

For most Wiccans, there is some degree of balance in their worship of the feminine and masculine deities.

And you can choose for yourself how much of the God you want to bring into your spiritual practice.

The one thing you must not do, however, is give the God more than half of the honour. It's far too easy to get out of balance that way, in a world and a culture that is already extremely overweighted toward the masculine. And the rising of the Goddess means the saving of the Earth, so She must be given Her due reverence.

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Wiccan Training


How can I find other Wiccans?

Finding other Wiccans is, sadly, usually not the beginning of the journey. You'll tend to find them more once you've started. Check out this article on finding other Witches for ideas that you can explore, though.

Usually people want to find other Wiccans for 3 reasons:

  1. They think that Witches have to be in covens
  2. They want to learn about Wicca from other people
  3. They want support and connection with a like-minded community

We'll look at the covens issue and learning from other people next, and finding a Wiccan community was covered up above.

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Do I need a coven?

Contrary to fiction, in real life the majority of Wiccans and Witches don't belong to covens. Most are Solitaries, and may join in group rituals from time to time... or not!

Still, the first thing a new Wiccan usually wants is a coven. If all you know of Wicca is from TV, you probably think you have to have one. Or you think you need a coven in order to learn.

Well, neither is true. You don't need a coven to be a Wiccan!

They can be helpful, but there are also down-sides to learning from a coven. See the article on Covens, Circles, & Solitary Wicca Practice for more info on that.

And you must be cautious when choosing a coven -- many people have ended up in real nightmare situations with bad covens. See this article on Coven Cautions for tips.

Anyway, here is some information to help you find a coven.

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How do I learn on my own, then?

Most Wiccans begin learning on their own. In some ways, it's unfortunate that you can't just walk up to a temple and ask to join.

But in other ways, it's actually a gift!

The key to being a Wiccan is heeding the Call of your own heart, and when you are forced to learn on your own, that's exactly what you learn to do!

  • You learn to follow your intuition, and your intuition gets clearer and more accurate.

  • You discover that the answers really do reside within yourself.

  • You develop confidence and self-esteem rather than fostering dependence on others.

  • And best of all, you forge an intimate, personal connection with the Divine when you have to rely on Her for training.

So rather than fret about having to fly solo for a while, make the most you can of this opportunity to discover what Wicca means to you!

Learn what you can on your own, take workshops if you can, read up on Wicca... and ...

Practice ... Practice ... Practice!

If there aren't a lot of learning opportunities in your area, then reading through great websites is a great start. : D

I recommend reading through this website, especially the section on Wicca for Beginners . This section also refers you to other resources, like books, and gives tips on choosing a good teacher.

Also vital is the section on being a Modern Shaman. This section is all about being a highly sensitive person, which you probably are if you are interested in Wicca. It will explain a lot of things you may have been wondering about, and how to protect yourself. Highly sensitive people are at risk in unique ways, and you need to know what to do.

Have you checked out the Wicca Info & Beliefs articles? There's a lot of useful information for beginners in them. In particular, there are some excellent books to help beginners get started, and even more great books here.

Being a Witch has info on finding other Witches and stuff.

The whole website in fact is here to teach you about Wicca. Pretty much everything you might want to know is there somewhere, so check it out. You can also use the Sitemap and Site Search to help you find what you're looking for.

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How can I find a teacher / mentor?

There's not much I can recommend re: teachers and mentors. I have a link to a couple options on this page about learning Wicca.

But teachers are hard to come by.

Most people need to start learning about Wicca on their own, and then at some point a connection is made with a teacher. This is the most common way for people to start, so you're in good company. wicca-spirituality-winking_witch

See this article for tips on choosing a good teacher, and avoiding a bad one.

Keep this one thing in mind: There must be giving as well as receiving, for the energy to flow well. What can you offer back to a mentor or teacher, in exchange for all you receive?

Some mentors don't accept or want anything in return, expecting that you will "pay it forward" rather than "pay it back." That's fine.

But it's not unreasonable for a teacher to request some form of energy exchange. It takes a lot of time and energy to mentor someone, and most people these days are struggling to get by. If they give time and help to you, they may need help from you in order to keep themselves afloat while giving you their care.

It is honourable to offer something in return (and really be ready to follow through). Ask them what they need. If they don't require anything, then commit to helping others in future.

One way or another, Balance must be maintained -- that's a requirement in Wicca.

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Will you be my teacher / mentor?

I wish I could help you as a mentor, but I'm sure you can understand that I get many requests of this nature. If I agreed to even a few of them, I would have no time to write the website and other resources that helps so many!

That's why I'm developing a Wicca School and courses for people who want guidance in learning Wicca Spirituality -- so you can get step-by-step instructions.

This course, plus the website, blog, 'zine, Facebook, and Twitter account are my way of mentoring you! Please take full advantage of all these opportunities for learning. Much of what you want to know is already there, and more is coming. (See below for links.)

Other than that, the practice and experience is up to you!

Even though I can't offer one-on-one assistance, I am here to help when I can.

So if you have specific questions, of course you may write and ask, and I'll do my best to answer them.

Most times, the questions are already answered somewhere on the website, so I encourage you to be thorough in your search before writing to me... that way you save up for the really important questions that you can't find on your own. The Site Search and Sitemap tools are really helpful for this.

There are other ways to learn from me as well... Have you signed up to get our our online magazine, or blog? Both have lots of helpful information, and they're free.

There is also a Wicca Spirituality fan page on Facebook and now you can follow Wicca Spirituality on Twitter.

You can even follow erin Dragonsong on Twitter.

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Where can I get extensive spiritual training?

I most highly recommend taking courses from either Yasodhara Ashram in western Canada, or at Radha Yoga centres near you. This will give you some of the best, most transformative, most important spiritual training you could ever receive!

(Take the 3-month Yoga Development Course if you possibly can!!)

If you're looking for deep spiritual development, this is among the best available.

This is not just physical hatha-yoga that they teach... it's powerful spiritual development on all levels. Their dream classes are always fun!

If you're under 30, you can get reduced rates at the Ashram, and even some free things -- there are lots of young people there.

Even if you are Wiccan, you will probably feel like you're coming home, when you go there. It is an extended family of spiritual and mystic people, like you. The natural surroundings are absolutely gorgeous. And the vibration of the land is incredibly strong and uplifting.

I guarantee that if you apply yourself, if you surrender to the process, it will change your life forever... making you happier and more successful than you would be otherwise.

And in case you're wondering, I receive nothing from them for these recommendations. I encourage all spiritual seekers to take advantage of the amazing opportunities they provide, only because it's among the best spiritual training anywhere.

I also highly recommend the Vipassina meditation retreats sponsored by Sri Goenka. You can find their retreats on their website.

One of the things I respect most about Goenkaji's training is that they do not charge for it. You are requested to make a donation AFTER taking a retreat, but you cannot pay beforehand. You donate so that others may take the courses. Your own course is free.

I have heard Wayne Dyer say that there is, unfortunately, no hospital you can check in to have an "ego-ectomy." But in my experience, this meditate retreat is that "hospital."

You will leave with your ego much-loosened... and it will never again be able to completely fool you.

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Telling People
(Coming Out of the Broom Closet)


Should I tell people I'm a Witch?

This is a tough question!

"Coming out of the broomcloset" is something to be approached with awareness.

It is freeing to be honest and open. Transparency is a spiritual practice all its own.

However, I don't necessarily advocate being completely open about being Wiccan. There are still situations and places where it can be dangerous.

It's a fine line: Wiccans won't be safe as long as we're closeted, but it's not necessarily safe to come out yet, either.

Being honest about Wicca is the only way Wiccans will be safe in the long run. It is thanks to the courage of gay and lesbian people in the '50s and '60s that there is more acceptance and safety for GLBT people today. But they took a big risk in coming out.

So everyone has to find their own balance between safety and activism, between being honest and taking care of oneself.

Here are some guidelines to follow:

  • Gather your own knowledge first. You can't explain Wicca to others if you aren't clear exactly what it is, yourself. Read a lot more in this website, for starters. The more you know, the easier it will be to explain in a positive way.

  • Start slowly, telling only people you know are safe.

  • Begin to advocate gently, clarifying when people misunderstand Wicca or use the words Wiccan or Witch in a negative context.

  • As you gain allies (people who support you and will stand up for your religious choices), you can start telling more people.

  • Avoid telling in situations where you could be harmed or have your life negatively impacted. (For instance, your job is not a good place to start, unless you'd be happy to leave it.)

  • Assess the possibilities before you say anything. If you think it could cause you more trouble than you can cope with, don't speak out.

  • When you are feeling strong and safe, you may wish to take on Wicca-phobia more actively by declaring your affiliation even more openly.

Just as if you were coming out of the gay closet, people sometimes don't want to hear about it because it makes them uncomfortable. They have some opinions or judgements about it, and sometimes false beliefs.

Often, over time, they work through these and become more comfortable with your choice. So give them time. They'll probably lighten up eventually... unless you push them too hard and they feel they need to dig in their heels! ; )

It's great to be able to be completely open! I'm just suggesting that it may be wise to think about where, when, and how to come out.

Which is kind of ironic advice, considering that my website is viewed by hundreds of thousands of people a year, and I could hardly be more "out" as a Wiccan! : D

But you must take care of yourself, and when you are bold, be bold with conscious awareness of possible consequences.

Continue reading for even more tips…

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Should I tell my parents I'm a Witch?

Before I answer that, I must ask this question: Why do you want to tell your parents that you are a Witch?

(And this goes for telling anyone, not just parents.)

I certainly have nothing against openness -- in fact, I think it is incredibly important, but sometimes the urge is there for the wrong reason, like ...

  • Getting attention,

  • Wanting to stand out and be different,

  • Wanting to rock the boat,

  • Pointing out other people's hypocrisies,

  • Even seeking approval and unconditional acceptance

Not that any of those are bad, necessarily... but they point to an immaturity in your spiritual journey. If you want to be Wiccan just to rock the boat, it's probably your own boat that needs rocking most of all.

But putting that aside, ask yourself: is this the right time? Are you prepared to face disapproval, fear, anger, perhaps worse? Can you explain Wicca calmly and clearly, when someone is upset and you feel threatened?

No one has to know that you are Wiccan. (See this FAQ: Being Wiccan Without Telling Anyone)

I would recommend holding your spiritual affiliation in your heart, for now. Especially when you are just starting out, and may find that Wicca isn't what you want after all. Let it be between you and the Divine.

The bottom line is, I'd recommend that you don't come out to your parents until you don't NEED them to be accepting. Anything else is taking a risk that you probably shouldn't take.

The more you NEED to tell them, the more you are probably being motivated by the wrong reasons. Even if your need is to be honest and open, that must be weighed against the impact on others and the danger to yourself. While you are dependent and subject to their laws, you need to be cautious about putting yourself in a dangerous position.

I don't know your parents at all. They may be very open and accepting, and safe to talk to. There is always a chance that this is one area where they are NOT accepting, though, so test the ice before you walk out onto it.

So my overall advice is to take care of yourself. Go slowly and gently; don't leap without preparing a soft landing.

For support, tap into the online communities, like my website and fan page, and Wiccan forums, and that sort of thing. It helps if you don't feel all alone. And it's a pretty safe way of reaching out to other Wiccans. (As always, never use identifying information online... create an "online persona" complete with name, birthdate, address, etc that you can use as a buffer.)

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Okay, but I'm really ready: So how do I tell my parents I'm a Witch?

When the need is strong enough, and you are strong enough, you can start dropping hints or leaving around information on what Wicca is really about.

And go gently.

Your parents will react more positively if they have time to get used to the idea, and if they find out beforehand the truth about Wicca. If all they know is the negative propaganda and stereotypes about Witches and you suddenly say you want to be one, you'll be in for some hard times!

This is being kind to your parents, as well as yourself. Don't set them (and yourself) up for failure! Give them a chance of being there for you, the way you want them to be.

What will probably help you most, in any circumstance, is being able to clearly say what draws you to Wicca, and why you are convinced it is an honourable spiritual path.

You might start with reading the articles I've written about Wicca, Jesus, and Christianity. Start here, and keep going: From Christian to Wicca: What You Need To Know

Write out for yourself the key points. And how you'd like to express them to your parents.

Remember that remaining calm will help get your point across much more than emotionality.

Ask the Goddess to come and stand with you, and help you. When you start to get flustered or frightened, rest back in Her arms and know you are safe with Her. (This is another good reason to wait a while, so you practice this ability until you can do it even when upset or scared.)

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My parents hate that I'm Wiccan! What can I do?

That is always a very unpleasant and even scary situation to be in!

It would be ideal if parents accepted and supported you in your choices, but that doesn't seem to happen very often. Sometimes it's because they have plans for you that they think will make you happy and safe, and they get worried if your plans differ. They can be concerned for your safety, and that makes parents rather crazy, as you may discover if you have kids someday. ; )

Sometimes too they fear that you will become different, and drift away from them. They can fear that these differences create a distance, and parents naturally want to be close to their kids.

This must be very scary for you. Without knowing more about your parents, it's very hard to know what to say. Are they likely to kick you out of the house if you don't follow their religion? Beat you? "Exorcise" you in their church?

What was their reaction when they found it? Why, did they say, they wanted to discuss it again later? Were they looking for more info in the meantime? or wanting to cool down first? or wanting to get their church buddies' support?

What you say will depend greatly on what your parents' fear or resistance is. Is it simply misunderstanding what Wicca is about? You might want to read, or get them to read: http://www.wicca-spirituality.com/misconceptions.html

It becomes more difficult if they are opposed because their religion tells them to be. If that's the case, they may fear for your very soul, and perhaps their own, and nothing you can say will change that. In time, if they are open-minded, they may shift their position, but you can't do that for them.

If that is the case, you need to consider your own safety. You need to have a home; you need support until you have acquired the skills, and age, to be able to support yourself. If you need to "give up Wicca" to maintain harmony in the household, I would probably recommend you do it. At least on the surface.

What lives in your heart is between you and the Divine, and is no other human beings business. No one can know what's in your heart unless you tell them.

You can honour the Divine in whatever form you want, in whatever manner, but don't bring home books etc. (You can always read the website) ; ) Don't talk about it.

I know, it can be incredibly frustrating, even heartbreaking, when your loved ones refuse to love and accept you for who you are. But that day can come! You have a long life ahead of you, Goddess grant, and though this may seem forever, you will be on your own very quickly. You can try to bring your parents around to acceptance then, if you choose.

For now, you need to take care of yourself. Ideally that means being able to be you, completely and openly. But if you don't have that option, know that you are in very good company: the best people often had repressive childhoods! ;-)

Remember, if you must pay lip service to their church for a while, that the root of all Christian sacraments and teachings is Pagan in origin. Look for the Truth hidden in the teachings. Look for what Jesus was really teaching: he offered a mystery religion that is nothing like christianism, but quite a bit like Wicca. This exploration can be a powerful spiritual practice and journey, if you choose for it to be.

You can even begin to work with Angels and Archangels -- that is within the bounds of most Christian sects. Of course, the angels aren't Christian, or even Christian discoveries, but ancient Light Beings who exist to or choose to help us humans. It's amazing what happens, for instance, when you tell Archangel Michael what you want, and ask him firmly but politely to do that for you! (And then, of course, remember to thank him!)

I wish you all the best. Know that the Goddess is with you, no matter what, loving you and holding your hand, and guiding you if you choose to listen.

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What can I do when people don't accept my spiritual path?

It can be very challenging to deal with people who have intense and narrow religious beliefs, even more so when they are our parents, partners, or others who are close to us!

Few things are as dismaying as hearing our loved ones tell us we are worshipping the devil and going to hell... often with heartfelt anguish at we are "lost and doomed to eternal suffering."

What can you do in this situation?

There is nothing really to do but avoid the subject. You won't change their minds. They may, in time, come to open their minds a little, but you can't force them. You already know their opinion, and that they won't hear yours, so why bother? Continuing debate only distresses everyone and generates more disharmony in the world, in my opinion.

And in the final analysis, it has nothing to do with anyone else. Your spiritual path is between you and the Divine.

You don't need to justify it. You don't need approval for it. You don't need to convert anyone.

Just live your spirituality the way that the Divine calls you to. In time, others will see by your actions that you are an honourable and spiritual person.

Your actions and lifestyle will speak far more loudly than words!

I regret to say, however, that if you're hoping for their approval, you may never get it. When people are extremely insistent on their own beliefs, they may never accept yours.

And then this is an opportunity to develop your own strength and character, by doing what you feel is right and not looking for approval!

It's a challenging place to be, and I hope you can reach out to the Wiccan community -- online if nowhere else -- so you don't feel completely isolated and alone.

This website has several free ways you can connect with other Wiccans and Wicca information online:

The Silver Chalice Wiccan email magazine

Wicca Spirituality Blog

Fan Page on Facebook

Wicca Spirituality on Twitter

erin Dragonsong on Twitter (for more general spirituality).

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How can I be Wiccan if I don't tell people?

You don't have to SAY anything, to be Wiccan. You don't need to do anything that anyone would recognise as "different." You don't need to own things that reveal your religious affiliation.

You can meditate and pray, without anyone knowing what exactly you are praying to. You can honour the Sabbats and the Esbats within your heart, without any overt display or ritual.

Your spirituality is not hidden from the Divine, and not apparent to anyone else unless you choose it to be.

You can have an altar so subtle, no one would even recognise it. An altar can be a flower on a windowsill! Or a picture of nature on the wall. Or a crystal in a potted plant.

You can do a ritual that consists of facing the Full Moon, opening your heart to that Light, and talking to the Goddess.

Wicca isn't about things you have or things you do. It's about you, the Divine, and the connection between the two. For that, all you need is yourself: your mind, and (ideally) your body. But really all you need is your mind. Even nature is, in this context, simply a "prop" to help you open that connection.

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Common Issues


Sometimes I see / hear / know things... Am I crazy?

This can feel really uncomfortable, and I empathize. At the same time, many people wish their whole lives for experiences like that! So I don't quite know whether to feel sympathy or envy! wicca-spirituality-winking_witch

Let me start by saying that there's absolutely nothing wrong with being able to see energies, know things before they happen, etc. It shows that you have a fine sensitivity, and that means that you're also extremely able to regain your connection with the Divine, while in this body. A priceless ability!!

It certainly doesn't mean you're crazy!

These things are real, and they really happen. Even science is beginning to recognise this.

For example, I was recently reading about HARD scientific evidence that not only do our intentions cause significant changes to happen, but that it doesn't matter whether it's in the future or the present or the past.

In other words, in these studies, people LITERALLY changed the outcome of events, that they set their attention on AFTER it had already happened.

There you have it. Not "new-age mumbo-jumbo" but scientific fact. (Isn't science amazing these days?)

It can be scary when things like that happen, but I suspect that is only because we don't understand them.

In our culture, we don't talk about those things. Many of us aren't even aware of them! Imagine the surprise you'd have if you suddenly saw aliens walking the streets of your neighbourhood! It's kind of like that. It's not expected, it's not understood, so it can be a little unsettling.

That doesn't make it bad. And it certainly doesn't make you crazy.

Should you learn how to use it? Of course! After all, if you are born with a gift, whether for intuition, track and field, training horses, or whatever, you have been given it for a reason, and you show gratitude by doing the best you can with it, and using it to help others.

Not only that, using it deliberately helps you retain command over the gift, so it doesn't take over when you don't want it to.

It does mean that you are most likely one of the highly sensitive people that I call Modern Shamans.

If this is true, there are some things you need to know about yourself and how to keep yourself safe. For your own sake, please read the Modern Shaman section thoroughly!

In any case, it is a sign that you have the potential for a very close connection with the Divine, and are being called to clarify that connection and be of service. The Divine is inviting you to be Her friend!

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Is there a way to stop these perceptions from coming to me?

If you really want to shut it down, you probably can. Many people do.

But I'll warn you that most people deeply regret this loss, later. And it can be very difficult, sometimes impossible, to reclaim it.

Plus, it can have serious repercussions, too, in that you are closing down a connection with the Divine that is meant to be open. How this impacts your life can only be guessed.

But if you really need to do it, you can tell your mind to block that awareness. Very firmly and clearly, as if you're giving yourself an order. Do this especially in the morning when you wake, and at night before you sleep.

It's absolutely amazing what your mind (and body) will do for you, if you state clearly and with authority what it is you want.

Whenever you do get an impression that you don't want, ignore it completely.

You can also ask the Divine or angels or your guides or whatever you like, to help you and shut it down.

Perhaps better, though, would be to ask them for help in controlling it, in being ready for it, and in knowing what to do with it.

Because it's obviously here for a reason!

You've been given this gift (even if sometimes it doesn't feel like one -- that's often the case!). And you have it because you're meant to use it in some way.

Shutting down is never the answer. It's always the wrong direction. The goal is to find ways to open up, to accept whatever life gives us!

It's like you're a little child who's been given an airplane. You don't know what to do with it. It'd be darn scary if you were up there in the air, expecting to control it! But one day, you'll grow into it. You'll learn, because you choose to, how to fly. Then you will really appreciate this precious gift!

(Please read the article on Energy Fields, since as a sensitive, it is vital to your health and sanity to know how to protect yourself. I'm in process of doing a whole series on this topic... you may want to check back to read up on it.

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Sometimes I feel drained when strange things happen... Why is that?

This is probably because you're out of balance.

When your mind / body can perceive things beyond your ordinary 5 senses, it is functioning at a level of high frequency, or vibration. If the rest of you is still functioning on ordinary, lower levels of vibration, this will stress the system.

Imagine plugging a toaster directly into an electric power plant! The energy that flows through you is too strong for your body to handle easily.

This can be remedied by " Preparing Your Sacred Chalice," that is, strengthening and refining all levels of your being (mind, body, speech, emotions) equally.

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I need healing... How can I heal myself?

Let me begin by saying, nothing is permanent! The very body you move and think with is made of completely new molecules and cells and atoms, compared with a year ago, and a year from now!

The energy field of an ailment may be persistent, but the body changes all the time, and energy is highly mutable!

Second, let me recommend something that has done an amazing amount for my health, well-being, and success: The Divine Light Invocation. If you do this often enough, it can't help but transform your entire being , physical and energetic as well. Find out how to do it in this article.

This is the first and best thing to do when you want health ... and to continue to do!

Another very transformative and healing practice is Mantra. It is easy to do, even for beginners, and immediately begins making positive changes in your energy field, your physical body, your emotional state, and your mind.

If you like to draw, Mandalas are also a great way to process issues and heal and uplift your body and soul . You can download a free template to draw on, at the bottom of this page.

Third, every "ailment" on the physical level is an attempt to give you a message that you have been unable to hear in any other way. Explore the symbolic meaning of the situation (you can work with it as if it were a dream you've had). Ask for dreams about it, and work with them (info on how to interpret your dreams. Dialogue with your body, the "disease", and the Divine . What is the underlying cause, that manifests in the symptom of "illness"? What is it you need to learn? What will bring you back to your natural state of health? (Health has not left you... you have left it. And if you have left, you can return.)

Fourth, remember your body is not your enemy but your most faithful and devoted friend! It isn't pleasant to go thru this situation, but your body is suffering it only so that you can receive a message that is vitally important, that you haven't yet been able to hear. Would you go thru this for a friend? Imagine how much your body must love you and care about you!

Bring to yourself all the kindness and love that you can. Love even your illness, to whatever extent you can. Love is an infinitely powerful healing force!

This is the starting point for healing. Do these things, and no matter what happens, you will be healed.

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How can I protect myself from other people wishing me evil or casting evil spells?

Don't worry... There is a lot you can do! You have the power to protect yourself, because the Divine is always on the side of good. If someone else wishes you harm, and the Divine wishes you well, I'd always put my money on the Divine to win!

All you need to do is harness that protective energy for yourself.

There's information on protecting yourself from curses and harmful magick, on the website. This article on being cursed may be of help.

If you follow the advice there, you will block any harmful intentions sent your way!

If you feel you've had it for a long time, chances are that you are now the creator of the curse. When we believe something deeply enough or for long enough, we set it into motion in our lives. So even if someone sent you some negativity, it's probably dissipated by now.

But you are keeping it alive.

That gives you even more power to break free. Just follow the advice in the article mentioned above, and this one on Magickal Self-Protection.

There won't be an instant easy solution, because changing ingrained beliefs takes some effort and practice.

But think of how wonderful it will feel to be rid of that burden!

If you are thinking about how to get back at someone for the presumed curse, don't!

Remember the Three-Fold Law? Rest assured that anyone wishing harm on another automatically incurs much more harm on themselves. You don't want to increase your problems by wishing harm on someone else!

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I want to honour a death in the Wiccan way... What should I do?

When someone we love passes, we want to honour and remember them. If they were Wiccan, or you are, it is most appropriate to celebrate in a Wiccan ceremony.

If they were troubled in life or died an unpleasant death, you may be concerned for their well-being in the afterlife, and want to do something to help them be at peace.

It is entirely appropriate to gather friends and family together for a memorial shortly after the passing, or on the birthday or death-anniversary of your loved one. Sometimes we do this on the Day of the Dead (Nov 1) or Samhain (Oct 31). This is a traditional time for Wiccans to gather to celebrate and reconnect with all of their beloved dead.

You can gather somewhere meaningful to you or your loved one.

You can light white or black candles (white is especially good if you are wanting to help them be at peace and find their way in the next life). Photos and memorabilia of your loved one brings warm memories.

Much of modern funeral services are drawn from these practices, and you can follow their format.

You may also want to do a ritual or spell to help your loved one. It's often enough simply to light a candle and pray for their peace and well-being, and ask them to be guided to the Divine Light.

Simple, but highly effective.

Those who speak for the dead say that they truly are helped by these prayers, and aware of us when we pray for them.

You might be interested in reading more about death from a Wiccan perspective.

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Requests


Will you do a spell for me?

I'm sorry, but I don't do spells this way, and I don't make spells for others. Creating a successful spell is something that requires deep knowledge of a person. That can't be done without extensive research.

Have you seen the book, Ask and It Is Given? It should be in any library... that or one of the other books by Esther and Jerry Hicks. That is one of the best ways to change your reality.

You can read a book review of Ask and It Is Given here.

Another POWERFUL tool is the Divine Light Invocation. Just make sure NOT to put anyone who abuses power into the Light, as this can give them more power. Only put in the light what you WANT to happen.

If you follow these two resources, you will see amazing things happen!

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Will you tell me a spell I can do for myself?

Sorry. This is beyond the scope of free services I can provide.

Besides, it's really not recommended for beginners to do spells -- too much can go wrong!

Start learning what you need to know to do magick with this article on the Essence of Working Magick here.

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Are you available for private consultation?

From time to time I do accept private consultations, spiritual guidance sessions, and psychic readings (these are all pretty much the same thing).

Please see this page if you are interested in getting a paid consultation.

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Can I print out articles for my friends to read?

Of course you're most welcome to share this information with your friends!

Unless you're posting it online, or republishing it in the public domain, there's no problem at all.

All I require in return is that you share the source of this material on each item...

  • A link to my website,

  • My name as author, and

  • A copyright mark.

It would also be appreciated if you would give back to the website in return. Find out how you can help support Wicca-Spirituality.com here.

After all, it's important to support those who are our teachers, so they can continue to share their knowledge.

Giving back for what we receive is a basic Wiccan principle.

And gratitude is a powerful spiritual practice... gratitude in action.

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Can I copy an article onto my website / blog / MySpace / etc?

It is ILLEGAL to copy material from one website and post it on another.

All the articles and most of the images on Wicca-Spirituality.com are protected by copyright law, with all rights reserved.

Copying anything from this site onto another site harms this website and the site it is posted on. Duplicate text is penalized by the search engines.

It is flattering when someone likes my page so much that they want to use it. However, if it is worth re-posting, it's obvious that I have worked hard to create it.

I completely understand what it's like to find something you want to share with other people. That's why I write! wicca-spirituality-winking_witch

If you would like to share this material with others, here are some options:

  • Please feel free to post a link to the original article.

  • You can Social Bookmark it with buttons at the top and bottom of every page.

  • Another idea that helps your site even more is you could write a review of the site or article with a link to it... this fulfills both your need to have interesting information for your readers, and the ethical and legal considerations.

Be aware that I take precautions in making dated copies of all of my work, so I can easily prove the copyright.

I routinely check for stolen content and take action. If stolen content is not promptly removed, I am forced to report this theft to the ISP provider for the site and the search engines. This can result in your site being blacklisted and/or shut down. You would also be open to legal repercussions.

Please respect the copyright laws and ethical responsibility.

As a Wiccan, you surely know that everything returns to you three-fold. Stealing content is not worth it!

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Can I reproduce an article for publication?

This may be acceptable in some situations, provided proper credit is given. However, no article, portion, or image may be reproduced without prior written consent.

Please contact me with details.

It's likely we can work something out, if not with the original article then perhaps with one written expressly for publication.

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Will you sell or recommend my product / service?

I am always happy to offer my readers products and services of benefit to them.

Because I am very selective and diligent in only offering quality products, my readers trust my recommendations. Which of course translates into good sales for you.

In order to maintain this trustworthiness, I need detailed information about what you offer, including the price. It's also helpful to see samples of it, so I can be certain it offers good value.

I also need to be sure of your dedication to customer service and satisfaction.

If you believe your product is high quality and likely to be enjoyed by my readers, and you run a truly honourable business, please contact me with information and samples, and I will be happy to consider your request.


With Bright Blessings,

dragonsong signature; click to write to erin

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